Life lessons I wish I’d learned long ago!

The other day I (Lynn) was going down the stairs while carrying scissors. Suddenly I had the memory of my mom’s voice telling me to keep the sharp end of the scissors pointed down. This was a good small life lesson but it got Doug and me thinking about life’s lessons and especially some of the big life lessons that we wish we would have learned long ago.

So Doug asked me, “What do you know now that you wish you would have learned earlier? Now I realize how meaningful family life is and I wish that, as a child, I would have shown my appreciation more. My family taught me it’s good to “stretch” and take more risks. If you “mess up”, your family will stand by you, support you and love you. Don’t waste any time worrying about what some other people think. They don’t really care and, for sure, they won’t lose any sleep over it! You will learn from each try and the learning helps you do a better job next time. Also, I learned not to be such a perfectionist. Yes, given the situation, there are times when you want what you are doing to be as “perfect” as possible and then there are times when “good is good enough”. Knowing the difference can make life a lot easier!

When I asked Doug the question about what life lessons he wished he’d learned long ago, he said, “I now recognize the importance of not only creating those special family moments that everyone remembers, such as family trips together, but also taking more time to do the “small” things that are important to your kids. Things such as those impromptu personal talks where you take time to ask your kids about how things are going for them – and then really listen. I also resonate with what Lynn said about taking more risks in doing things without worrying so much about making mistakes.”

Doug also shared a familiar quote, first attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift. That’s why they call it the present.” This helps us see how yesterday’s life lessons can affect the present and also make a difference in the future. We decided to talk to some people to ask them what they know now that they wished they had learned earlier in life.

We met Jack Atkins and asked him that question. He replied, “I wish I had realized how important it was to spend more time with my family. That would have made me a better person and a calmer person.” When asked what another result would be, he said, “I guess I wouldn’t be trying to catch up and make up for lost time now.” Lots of people realize that kids grow up so fast. His children are all grown now but he recognizes he can still spend time with them.

We also met Kim Wellman. She shared that what she knows now is, “Friends and family are most important over anything else in your life.” I agree that is a good priority to have for your life. Then I asked Kim what differences would have been in her life if she had known that earlier. She said, “It’s always been important to me but as you get older, it becomes more and more important, I think, and [also} having lots of different friends from lots of different places.” I agreed with Kim that these relationships do become more important as one gets older and having a variety of friends is wonderful.

After reflecting on our life and hearing from others, the common theme was that the most important learning was not from text books or job skills, but rather it was about treasuring close connections and relationships. How about you? How do you want to use your life’s lessons?

Here’s a challenge: We invite you to look back on your life to recognize some of the life lessons you have learned. Then identify the learnings that are really important to you. Also, what seem like small lessons sometimes yield big results. What lessons can you put into practice today so that you have an even better tomorrow? What lessons do you want to share with someone else? If you don’t have a family around you to practice some of those life lessons, gather with friends or join a group to create good experiences and new enjoyable memories. We would love to hear what life lessons, big and small, you are using to live your best life.

Chanhassen residents Doug and Lynn Nodland are owners of The Balance Center. They can be contacted at WeCare@SharingLifesLessons.com

© Doug and Lynn Nodland 2017 Articles and videos may be shared in their entirety with attribution.