How an icy road revealed a family’s strengths

In Minnesota, it seems like weather never ceases to be a topic of conversation. Also, recently we heard about the extreme icy conditions that were causing all sorts of havoc on the streets and highways of… Texas.

As we were listening to the problems that were occurring because of this icy weather, we couldn’t help but reflect on a situation that happened to my (Doug’s) parents years ago as they were driving through Texas during an ice storm.

First, a bit of background to help set the scene for what happened. My parents were farmers in Iowa. As they were nearing their retirement years, they saw many of their neighbors leaving Iowa during the winter to become ‘snowbirds’ in Arizona. They decided to try it for a month to see how they liked it. It turns out they loved it. Any why wouldn’t they? 20 of their church friends and neighbors were already there. It was like their whole small community in Iowa was transplanted to Mesa, Arizona.

The following year they decided to permanently retire in Arizona. They set up a huge sale of all their farm equipment to be held in late March. While driving back to Iowa to prepare for that big, final sale they encountered extremely icy roads in Dalhart, Texas. Many people have different types of phobias. Wouldn’t you know, Mom’s was icy roads! They stayed overnight at a motel in Dalhart, hoping the next day would be better. It wasn’t. Neither was the next day.

Dad was worrying about all that needed to be done in Iowa to get ready for the impending farm sale. He felt if they waited longer, he wouldn’t be able to have everything ready for the scheduled sale. He made the decision that they had to leave, regardless of the road conditions. Mom said she couldn’t go because of the icy roads. They mutually agreed that Dad would leave, and Mom would stay in Dalhart. (I don’t know what they worked out as to how Mom would get back to Iowa.)

Now is when the story takes some ‘interesting’ twists. The next day, Mom felt guilty about not going to Iowa with Dad. Also, she didn’t feel right about spending money for hotel and food without being ‘productive’. That reveals her work ethic as a farmer and being frugal. She walked to the nearest restaurant and applied to be a waitress. They hired her!

Several days later, two ladies walked in to have dinner. They were from Minneapolis and on their way to Mexico for some mission work. There was a lull in the customer traffic so Mom started talking with them. Mom mentioned that she had a son who was an attorney in the Minneapolis area. One of the ladies asked his name. Mom replied “Douglas Nodland”. The lady exclaimed, “He’s my attorney!” Small world!

A few more days went on. Mom noticed a recreational vehicle drive up to the restaurant with an Iowa license plate.  Mom chatted with the couple as she waited on them. The story came out as to how Mom was there. The couple said, “You can ride back to Iowa with us.” So, she did. What a Godincident! Turns out she arrived back at the farm late afternoon just as the farm sale was ending.

Mom and Dad went on to have many wonderful years together in Arizona. Their story became one that was always a fun topic of conversation with family and friends.

In reflecting back, this experience showed different strengths for each of my parents. For Dad, it was the perseverance to keep going, regardless of the circumstances. As a farmer in his situation, this quote by Greg Kincaid seems particularly pertinent. “No matter how much falls on us, we keep plowing ahead. That’s the only way to keep the roads clear.”

For Mom, this story showed her resourcefulness and resilience in making the best of a difficult situation. The words of Elizabeth Edwards apply to how Mom handled her dilemma, “Resilience is accepting your new reality, even if it’s less good than the one you had before. You can fight it, you can do nothing but scream about what you’ve lost, or you accept that and try to put together, something that’s good.”

What about you? What stories do you and your family have from encounters with those “icy roads of life”? Sometimes we slip and fall. When we do, what’s important is to get up, learn from it and skate forward.

Chanhassen MN residents, Doug and Lynn Nodland are success coaches and owners of The Balance Center in Excelsior. Contact them at WeCare@SharingLifesLessons.com

© Doug and Lynn Nodland 2023 Articles and videos may be shared in their entirety with attribution.