Six strategies to deal with life’s stressful surprises

This week we were working in our lower level when we heard something – drip…drip…drip. Hmmm! After playing a short game of “you’re getting colder, getting warmer” with the sound, we narrowed it down to the closet. When we fully opened the door, we were surprised to see a big water mark on the ceiling and water dripping down from the ceiling light! ‘Fortunately’, it was dripping onto a box, which enabled us to hear it, rather than dripping onto the carpet which would have muffled the sound. Further detective work revealed the leak was coming from a water pipe in the room above.

It’s true that life can have some surprises that can be both good and bad. Even when the surprise is a happy one, like a surprise birthday party, it can be stressful for some people. However, there are ways to successfully deal with stressful surprises. Here are six strategies to use, whatever the situation, to help the overall outcome be positive.

Accept Surprises as Challenges

Sometimes people ask, ‘Why is this happening to me?’ Let your mindset accept the fact that everyone’s life will have some surprise circumstances that are stressful. This will help you to know that you’re not alone. When you can look at a stressful situation from all sides you can learn, grow, and lower feelings of stress.

Practice Positivity

Be as positive as you can in not only thought, but also in how you take care of your health. When you get enough sleep, eat healthy food and exercise, it will go a long way to help you deal with stressful surprises. These actions will also contribute to a feeling of well-being, even though the situation may be stressful. Choose to avoid negative actions such as ‘awfulizing’ the situation or neglecting your health, which would only make it worse.

Get Back to Nature

Research reveals that being in nature is a good way to sooth the soul.  Sunshine is nice but if weather is not good, even some nature films on TV or Internet can help. There are studies showing that moving water can help lower stress and raise mood. If you can’t find a stream or lake nearby, even a shower may help you feel better. When dealing with something stressful, go for a walk outside and feel the stress fade away.

Build a Routine

When you have a routine, you have a better chance of keeping balance in your life when stressful surprises come up.  Having a good routine of positive habits will help you keep going. It will also keep you from getting stuck in a negative situation for a prolonged period. It’s easier to do positive things for yourself when they’re scheduled because they become habits and you don’t just rely on willpower.

Learn to Self-Sooth

Learning to calm yourself is a valuable skill. Self-soothing is a method of incorporating several actions that can bring down anxiety as well as lowering blood pressure. To sooth yourself, try taking some slow, deep breaths. Meditation can also lower blood pressure and help you feel relaxed as you clear your mind so you can make good choices. These calming methods can make meeting the little stressful surprises easier and also help when you face bigger stresses.

Tell People Your Preferences

When it comes to other people giving you unwanted surprises (good or bad), it’s important to let people know your preferences. Dr. Phil said, “We teach people how to treat us.” Most people want to do something nice for you and not give you an unwanted surprise. So, it’s your job to let them know how you want to be treated. Let them know if you like to prepare ahead of time for interactions and only like one-on-one meetings or small gatherings. Then both they and you will end up happier with the results.

What about you? How do you react to life’s surprises? Remember that surprises can be good or bad. When surprises are stressful, you can use them as an opportunity to learn something new. You’ll also learn how you’re able to deal with the surprise. As Deborah Meaden says, “Sometimes, lovely surprises come out of things going wrong.” In a stressful surprise situation, the ultimate result can be positive because of your learning and how you are able to overcome the stress. After all, we learned some new plumbing, electrical and painting tips because of our stressful surprise.

Chanhassen MN residents, Doug and Lynn Nodland are success coaches and owners of The Balance Center in Excelsior. Contact them at WeCare@SharingLifesLessons.com

© Doug and Lynn Nodland 2022 Articles and videos may be shared in their entirety with attribution.