Exploring Perspectives

Have you ever had a time when you realized that you and another person just didn’t agree? If you say “yes”, you are not alone. We don’t all think alike and it is easy for misunderstandings to occur.

Doug and I were having a discussion while standing outside next to a feeder that hangs in our front courtyard. Yes, that is a strange place to have a dialogue. We wondered what you and other people would say if you were here with us. Motioning to the feeder, Doug said, “Do you know what this is?  I know what most people would think. They would think it’s a bird feeder – right?  Wrong! It’s a squirrel feeder!” I jumped in and asked him, “Why do you think it’s a squirrel feeder?”  He quickly responded, “The intended use of it was as a birdfeeder but the predominant use of it is as a squirrel feeder because the squirrel is here eating at it all the time, eating up all the food and there is usually nothing left for the birds”.

See how we have a different view of this situation? I (Lynn) want it to be a community feeder where everyone is welcome at the table.

We decided to share a little of our backgrounds so you can understand  how our life’s lessons contributed to our different perspectives.

Doug shared, “I grew up on a farm in Iowa. We raised a lot of corn and we had corn cribs.  We had squirrels that would chew through the wood of the corn cribs and then the corn would flow out onto the ground and be wasted. So, I came to look at the squirrel as – not so good!”

I piped in, “Rats, you had rats!”  Doug agrees, “Yes rats, too, but squirrels are the same – they just have bushier tails”.

I shared that I saw a squirrel completely differently. When we moved from the farm to a second-floor apartment, I couldn’t have any pets – except the squirrel.  The squirrel came and sat on my shoulder.  He even tried to follow me to school and I had to tell him to go home. My conclusion is that squirrels are really nice.

You can see how people can view the same thing, such as the squirrel, and have completely different perspectives based on things that have happened in the past.

Doug now admits, “I have come to have a much more favorable opinion of the squirrel after watching him and his antics and gymnastics trying to climb the pole and get his food”. Now, we can understand each other’s perspectives.

So we wonder about you. Have you ever had disagreements in the past over something that seemed pretty clear to you?  Maybe it would be good to inquire of the other people how they came to their conclusions. Then you will have a better understanding.   We hope you enjoyed this message and that you will take it in to your life. Also, we are curious – for you, is it a bird feeder or a squirrel feeder?

Here’s a Challenge: We encourage you to take time to really look at things from other people’s eyes, from their perspectives. We would enjoy hearing as to how this works for you.

© Lynn Nodland 2017
Chanhassen residents, Doug and Lynn Nodland are owners of The Balance Center. They can be reached at WeCare@SharingLifesLessons.com