What helps make a house a home?

Lately, we’ve noticed several instances where the word home has come up. Some TV commercials talk about protecting your home – not your house. Even at church a slide came up on a big screen that mentioned being at home in church. Also, we’ve been listening to music lately as we drive to work. One song we heard was A House is Not a Home by Hal David and Burt Bacharach. That song got us thinking about what the difference is between a house and a home. We all recognize there’s a lot of difference! A house is defined as a building or shelter, whereas a home has a much deeper meaning.

So what does it mean to have a home and not just a house? It’s definitely not about the size of the place. Maybe you don’t live in a house, maybe it’s an apartment or maybe you are in a single room. But wherever you live, does it feel like home?

To feel like home, most people want the place they live to feel comfortable, enjoyable and safe. Safety doesn’t just mean safe from nature’s elements like storms with wind and rain, but also emotionally safe from the storms of angry people. Even the grandest house might not feel like home if emotions run negative, hot and high. And it’s also possible that a tiny space might become a comfortable and enjoyable home if it’s peaceful and there’s a happy feeling when you are there.

This quote from an unknown author talks about the difference between a house and a home: “A house is made with walls and beams. A home is made with love and dreams.” Often a home is a place where loved ones live together and lives change. There’s activity and growth as children develop and eventually leave. It’s a place where activities flourish and time passes so quickly.

Maybe your life doesn’t involve the traditional family home. Maybe your life is different or has changed and dreams have taken an unexpected shift. You may have experienced events that changed the feeling of home for you now. Maybe it feels lonely because you have lost a loved one. Maybe you are simply living alone and it gets a bit lonely at times. Maybe your place is not as comfy and enjoyable as you would like it to be.

So, why is it important for you to enjoy your home? It matters because home can be a sanctuary away from the world where you can totally relax and be yourself. You have freedom to do what you want to do. Research shows that when you are comfortable in your home, there are feelings of contentment and stress is lowered. All this is good for your health. Now, knowing the benefits of feeling good at home, let’s look at some ways to make the place you live feel more like home.

Let your heart rule your style. When creating your home space many lifestyle experts say you should be ruled by your heart, not your head. It’s your space and you get to decorate it, fill it up or simplify it, to suit your desires. What is clutter to one person can be life treasures to another.

Your home style will evolve. Be open to the changes in your life. You probably will want your space to reflect those changes. Always have a comfortable place for what you like to do, such as having a cup of coffee while you read a book or any hobbies like painting. Some people have a designated room or even just a corner of a room for prayer and meditation. They incorporate a small fountain and candles. Comfortable yet functional is the goal.

Make your home come alive. Sometimes plants can provide a feeling of aliveness. You care for them and watch them change as they grow and develop. Also, especially if you find you are a bit lonely, a pet that works well with your lifestyle may be a wonderful addition to make your space feel more like home. Invite people to visit you because people can add life and joy to your home.

Practice peace, patience and appreciation for all who enter or share your home as this fosters happiness.

Encouragement: We’ve shared ideas on how to lower stress by creating your comfortable home. Let us know how you used your creativity to make your house a home. Remember John Payne’s lyrics, “Be it ever so humble, there’s no place like home.”

Chanhassen residents Doug and Lynn Nodland are Success Coaches and owners of The Balance Center. They can be contacted at WeCare@SharingLifesLessons.com

© Doug and Lynn Nodland 2019 Articles and videos may be shared in their entirety with attribution.