Face your fear in this new year!

Have you ever been afraid? If you answered “no”, you must be the only one! Everyone has some fears. Maybe you call it anxiety, a lower level of fear. If you read our last column, we both are picking one word to live by for a year. Doug chose “bold” and I (Lynn) chose “stretch”. Being bold and stretching will involve overcoming fear because we’ll be moving into the unknown this year. You also might have some anxiety to overcome as you face different situations in this new year. Feeling fearful is not comfortable. Let’s look at how our physiology reacts when we are afraid and what to do about it. We’ll also share examples of fears we encountered and some ways to overcome fear.

First, let’s look at what happens when we are afraid. Lots of things change with our physiology. You might get hints such as a funny feeling in the pit of your stomach or feeling uneasy. Hormones are released and symptoms escalate rapidly. Heartrate and breathing increase and blood is shunted to muscles. In the brain the reactive amygdala gets triggered which makes it more difficult to have the problem-solving frontal cortex plan the best course of action. All this activity happens to get you ready to fight, flee of freeze.

Even though our everyday stressors are not usually life-threatening, chronic anxiety and fear can be bad for health. The immune system is lowered, there can be cardiovascular and digestive problems and even accelerated aging. Over-reactive brains may contribute to impulsive decisions and inappropriate actions. Also, fatigue and depression can result.

Here are a couple of situations that caused fear for us. What happened to me (Lynn) was not serious but it certainly got my anxiety up. I had finished my doctorate but was in my internship. My mentor and I were at Fairview Southdale Hospital where he was giving a talk to a crowd of doctors and healthcare staff. Without previously warning me, he announced to the whole audience, “Dr. Nodland will now talk on the section on fear.” I thought, ‘What, me?” Yes, I wanted to flee. I felt like a child, totally unprepared. I worried I would faint or not be able to go on. Fortunately, I took a slow deep breath, gathered my wits and gave the talk. I starting by telling the audience that my mentor must have wanted to give a real-life example of fear for them to see. That was a quick life lesson for me on confronting fear.

I (Doug), like most people, have had fearful moments in life. I remember one “life or death” situation. In high school, I was a passenger in a car being driven by a friend. It was a bright sunny day and we were on a two-lane road. My friend pulled out to pass a car. I saw an oncoming truck and knew we would not be able to complete the pass without being hit head on. My friend froze. I yelled two words – his name and NO! Fortunately, he reacted and dropped back into our lane, just as the truck whizzed past us. Whew!

Doug’s encounter was very scary but often you have more time to deal with a fearful situation. Here are some ways to help confront your fears. First, identify what you are fearful of and why. What is the real threat? Then reprogram your brain to have positive thoughts about the outcome. Get rid of negative thoughts that make the fear greater than it is and keep you from confronting it. Look at what is needed to be able to face the fear. Would support or a mentor be helpful? You can learn what you need to do. Then, it’s time to take action and confront the fear. Franklin D. Roosevelt said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” What about you? What fears do you want to confront?

Here are some ideas: Take time to assess your fears. Listen to your body as it may give clues as to what is contributing to anxiety. We also suggest following good habits of a healthy diet, some regular exercise, restful sleep and promoting good social relationships. Spiritual beliefs in your Higher Power can also calm anxiety. Use the ideas set forth in this article to help you confront your fear and feel better. However, if fearful feelings are serious or persistent, consider talking to a health professional. We want you to overcome your fears so you can enjoy this new year to the fullest!

Chanhassen residents Doug and Lynn Nodland are Success Coaches and owners of The Balance Center. They can be contacted at WeCare@SharingLifesLessons.com

© Doug and Lynn Nodland 2018 Articles and videos may be shared in their entirety with attribution.